I had a weird spam account register as a user today so I checked out the email address and another blog noted that this user was a problem because there used to be a WordPress bug that allowed Subscriber level users to delete a blog.

At least that’s what I think is the problem. The blog I found the info on is Dutch and there are not a lot of great free Dutch translation sites.

So, until I find more on this or a plugin to hold new user registration until I approve it, I’m taking down the registration option. Existing users can still log in and if new users want to subscribe, they can just email me.

Real update tomorrow after my research interview!

I start training for my new position tomorrow. I moved into my new office on Friday and successfully made the move last most of the day. IT helped with that by not connecting my computer and phone for a while. I didn’t mind, it gave me more reason to bug coworkers, sort through papers and carefully arrange my toys on my new desk.

The new office is shared so I sat in each coworker’s chair when they were gone to verify they could not see what I was writing. They can see pics so I guess that means no more lolgay.com during work hours.

I’ve been looking into microdermals/dermal anchoring more since I told myself I could get a new mod when I get a new job. I’ve watched a few videos on YouTube and they kind of make me squirm. There’s a lot of poking around in holes going on with the procedure. I can’t watch the needles when I get blood drawn, so watching these videos may not be a good indicator of how well I can handle the piercing. I don’t know anyone with this specific piercing because it’s a fairly new technique. So far ModBlog and BME Zine have been my guides to technique and individual’s experiences. It’s probably time to go talk to the piercer in person.

I went to the Pride parade because I’m pretty sure you’re kicked off the team if you don’t attend. Lots of drag queens, even more corporate sponsorship. Yay a bunch of banks love gay people! Dual income gay couples! Woo!

I am having awesome job day!

Today I got a call for a 2nd interview for the research job I applied to last month. I thought they had forgot about me because I thought they wanted someone to start by July 1. Well I guess they just wanted to hire by July 1 and I’m in for the 2nd round.

Then later in the day, I find out I got the position I interviewed for last week at my current workplace. I accepted and I’m now a step above cube monkey!

I’m still going to do the 2nd interview for the research job because it’s still a damn hot job and I would be making more doing research than I would with my new position. I will feel bad for leaving a position right after they train me but I don’t have that much empathy for my current huge, faceless employer that I would pass up the research job.

I am so very popular.

Lots of music related fun going on!

Last week I saw the Whirling Dervishes at Millennium Park. My friend told me to go see them and I had to read up on Sufism while I was at work. It’s kind of strange that the whole performance is really a prayer ritual and it’s interesting enough that people outside of their culture and religion come to watch it. Maybe if Catholic mass were this interesting, I would still go to church. :)

This morning I bought tickets to Grinderman, Nick Cave’s new band(side project?). They’re only playing a few dates in the U.S. so I’m really excited to see them. I like the upper-middle age white man music (Nick Cave, Morrissey, Tom Waits) almost as much as I like the upper-middle age white man movies (Weatherman, American Beauty, Life Aquatic). I swear I don’t have father issues.

Then tonight I went to Taste Of Randolph street fair and saw the Smoking Popes. Maybe my memory is off but weren’t they a little punk? They sounded much more poppy than I had remembered. Or maybe I had no idea what punk was when I listened to them in high school. When I saw Local H at a street fair last year, they sounded just like I had remembered. Not so much this time, Smoking Popes.

The one thing I’m damn girly about is shoes. So I went to the Skechers Outlet today, conveniently located in the hood and looked for some new everyday type shoes. My black velcro Skechers are starting to wear out and I duct taped the hole in the fabric of the back inside heel. The hole is my fault, I always pull on my shoes from the back.

So once I found out the shoes were cheap, I got these lovelies:

Adoorrable! The first shoe has a lot of shiny detail that doesn’t show up in the picture. I likes the shiny.

OK, must combat the girlness.

I finished motorcycle class and there was no death. I feel better about riding, was able to control my anxiety in the class and got asked out by a boy in class (I said no, I just wasn’t into him.)

I was amazed by the “stupid general public” (the instructor’s words) around the class. The class was at a college and unfortunately located next to a soccer field. Kids would walk across the driving range which was obviously marked off by orange cones. Moms would drive their strollers a few feet from a group of unsteady riders. A kid chased his ball onto the range, just like in the safe driving commercials! My favorite was when a school bus ran over the curb and drove next to us to get out of the parking lot. It was a lot of good example, if people can’t pay attention to 12 motorcyclists surrounded by orange cones, they will not pay attention to 1 on the road.

OK, motorcycles, loud pipes..I don’t feel so girly anymore.

Now I’m going to go plan tomorrow’s outfit around my shoes.

My new internet ritual is to check email, look at MySpace (you stupid time waster) and check Nerve personals to see if new people want to potentially date me.

It’s  a half hearted attempt to get back into the game after 2 months of being SO-less. I’m pretty sure I’m ready.

Another ritual I like much more than waiting for random people I may not like to express interest in me is to drink with coworkers, take the bus home while still blurry eyed, go to Walgreens and get Gatorade and something sweet and consume both before falling into bed.

It’s much more rewarding.

I saw a pre-screening of Eagle vs Shark last week with a coworker. (Thanks for the free passes coworker!)
At first glance, it appears to be Napoleon Dynamite as an adult but since this movie was not made by MTV, it has depth that your mom could only dream of (at college).

After the movie, there was a Q&A session with the director and female lead, both adorable kiwis. (People from New Zealand are called kiwis right?) They talked about the difference between how the film is viewed in New Zealand vs U.S. Here, we’re like “Oohh pretty, Mordor!” but the director wanted the town to look as plain as possible. Hard to do when you’re surrounded by mountains and ocean. The accents were hard to get over, too. Everytime the lead female says “yees” you want to smile. I’m sure there were local references in the movie that completely went past me. I think there are just small differences in movies when the director isn’t making the movie for the entire world. He said he was happy it is being released in the U.S. but it didn’t sound like his intentions were world-wide release when he made the movie.

It is good and it opens next week. Go see it.

I found the most awesome candy at Vosge last week.
Bacon chocolate bars!
They kind of taste like salty chocolate with just a hint of bacon bits. The Vosge staff said this bar was their attempt at luring guys into the store. “Come to the pretty purple truffle store…we have bacon!”

I saw my defective heart doctor today and it was a good visit because I actually got to talk to him. Maybe he talked more because I was the first appointment of the day or because he didn’t have his trusty resident sidekick with him.

I asked him about the herbs my acupuncturist wants me to try in addition to acupuncture. He gave me a straight No on some like licorice because it raises blood pressure. He told me if I really wanted to, I could Google the unidentifiable ones to see what is actually in them. He is concerned some contain ephedrine which is bad for my condition. We talked about the importance of knowing what I’m putting in my body and not screwing with the nice meds I’m taking now.

Then he asked me how I felt about my quality of life and I told him how my ICD just creates more anxiety in me rather than making me feel like I have a safety net. I talked about anxiety over hearing that it picks up these tiny little incidents and I spend the day trying to think if I did anything different the day my heart was beating worse than usual or if I worked out too hard. I don’t want to be oblivious to my heart problem but I also don’t need a constant reminder.
And I finally told him I want to get sterilized. No babies for me. His first question was “Are you married?” No but I will pretend if it gets me this surgery dammit. He said my heart probably could not handle pregnancy but I should talk with a high risk obstetrician about it. I said again, no I do NOT want babies. I don’t want to know about the risks associated with trying to have babies.

I will go talk to my gynecologist and see if she has anything better to say and if she does not maybe I will get a referral to a high risk OB/GYN just because they would be more likely to have worked with someone in my situation.

If I wanted to have kids there would be a team of doctors swarming to help me through the pregnancy but since I don’t want kids, I have to fight to get a doctor to listen to me. I know society values breeding and all that but doesn’t it value someone trying to protect their own life? I know that sounds dramatic because I would be the type to get an abortion if I did get accidentally knocked up instead of risking my life with a pregnancy. I’m just frustrated with asking this question and getting resistance. I’m in my prime baby making years. If I don’t want kids now, I’m not going to want kids 5 years from now. And if I meet a wonderful person that wants kids out of me, we probably have different goals in life and should not be together long term. I’ve given this a lot of thought and want a doctor to take my questions seriously instead of encouraging me to wait until I have a man in my life. What is the presence of an SO going to do? Is he going to be making my decisions for me? I need a doctor that can look at me and not see marriage and kids.

I started the Motorcycle Rider Program this weekend. This is my 2nd time taking the class. I took it a few years ago, passed and got my motorcycle license but I’ve never felt confident with my riding skills. So since I might actually have money to fix my bike and start riding again this summer, I’m taking the class again.
Most people in this class have riding experience but aren’t licensed. I was very anxious the first time I took the class and probably the least experienced. Now I am not as anxious because I already have my license, I’m not worried about passing the test.  I still don’t like 2 instructors scrutinizing my every move and all my classmates watching me.
I’ve got a cute little Rebel to ride during the class (theirs, not mine) because I’m one of the shortest. They supply helmets too and I wore a 3/4 helmet today with my riding glasses. I liked it for our slow around the parking lot riding but I don’t think I would like it for faster street riding. It does save me from the chipmunk cheeks I get with the full face helmet. I bet that looks real cute.

The class is led by 2 completely different guys. Guy 1 is a middle aged, geeky white guy. He’s pretty normal except he has this weird, closed mouth laugh that sounds like it should come from a horse muppet. Guy 2 has an awesome matte black skull helmet. He said he gets a lot of comments on his helmet because of his line of work. He’s a funeral director. I would so love to see his bike parked outside a funeral home.

When I got home I noticed I have two bracelets of suburn on my wrists from the space between my riding gloves and the sleeves of my shirt.

I sold out at work and applied to another position. I said I was going to leave and I’m still applying for outside jobs but a position that I wouldn’t mind having at work opened up and I applied. I’ve talked with my immediate supervisor about it and now have to wait to see if HR interviews me. The position is more clinical, I would have a different immediate supervisor and I would still get LCSW supervision. A lot of the stupidity that pisses me off in my current position would be eliminated. I’m not being offered any great alternatives right now so I guess I’m not losing anything by applying. Oh, except my soul. They still get to suck on that.