Go see Wall-E. It’s the cutest damn movie I’ve seen in a long time. It’s not cute but vapid like a cheerleader it’s more cute and thoughtful like a Hallmark card on your mom’s birthday. It has a green message but I don’t think it overpowers the story. And is it really about Mac and Windows? I don’t know.

I went to a family member’s girlfriend’s baby shower today and it was pretty awful. My family was surprisingly not embarrassing but the girlfriend’s family was a big mess. It was just a bad mix of getting knocked up young, disapproving family, alcohol, big fat asses, uncontrolled children and general suburban suck. Makes my fallopian tubes curl up and try to tie themselves.

If this picture doesn’t make you smile, you’re probably the devil.
Obama’s Ipod

I’ve been getting a lot of “where have you been?” lately. I have (purposely) been busier lately and I guess my ninja quick email and text replying have been missed.
I went to a research seminar last week. I am all sorts of educated about NIH research and grants. So now I just have to get my snail moving workplace to get on this grant stuff. I also learned that the NIH has a program to repay 25% of doctorate level loans as long as you promise real hard to stay in research.
I’m still working on the proposal that I should have been finished with last week. I have until Wednesday to make something pretty. It only has to be 15 double spaced pages. I should be able to do this without a problem but my head has not been in the office lately. I don’t know where my head has been. It feels like it’s been off racing cars somewhere.

I went to wedding 2 of 4 last night. High school friend, saw lots of people I haven’t seen in years, got weepy and emotional, drank too much, greeted thorny bushes outside, terribly hung over today. So I guess I was wrong about weddings make you feel grown up.

I’ve been slacking on meditating and not really feeling like I have a good grasp on this whole Buddha thing so I started an intro to Buddha class. I was meditating at a Zen temple/dojo and I’m taking the class at a Pure Land temple.

I’ve talked a little about the difference between Zen and Pure Land but the best comparison I’ve heard so far is that you can walk or take a boat, you’re still going to get to the same place. (That’s not the direct quote but the idea is there.)

That doesn’t mean I am giving up on meditation. I liked meditation especially at the temple. The little bit of ritual helps me focus.

The first class was about the different sects of Buddhism and where they came from. I started thinking about how long Buddhism has been around when the teacher pointed out that certain terms are Sanskrit. One person in class said his family has been part of the temple all of his life but he has never learned the basics. No Sunday school as a kid for him. Buddhism goes much deeper than reading scripture and sticking a Jesus fish on your car. It’s like gender. Society and family teach you what it means to be a girl but they don’t give you a book or make you take lessons on how to be a girl. Some people see Buddhism as more of a culture or philosophy than a religion. Older members of the temple pride themselves on not having studied Buddhism, they say it’s not necessary when you live it.

I like the teacher for this class. He’s an old white guy, retired teacher, a forgetful professor type. He became interested in Buddhism about 30 years ago but I think he comes from a Jewish family. I googled him and found a site with his poetry. Some of his poems are dirty! I am well aware that seniors like to get it on but it’s always surprising to see evidence of it.

The nice weather has put me into a good mood. Pink jelly shoes also put me in a good mood. I had a hard time finding jelly shoes last year but Target has a bunch this year. They’re not comfy or practical but they scream summer nostalgia.
I walked around a lot yesterday. I stopped at Starfruit along the way. They have Kefir frozen yogurt. It’s a little bitter at first but the more I got into my cup of cherry, the more I liked it. And according their noisy, boingy site, it’s all low fat.

How can I not like boxing? Look how cool I look with my hands wrapped.

I started boxing boot camp today. So I’m not actually boxing, I’m learning techniques necessary to punch people in the face. My class is small and all women and our instructor is very supportive. My drill partner cheered me on as I tried to put my whole body into uppercuts and hooks. I’m sure I looked ridiculous. I don’t care. This is the most fun I’ve ever had in a gym

And I’m exhausted.

I checked out the drag kings on Friday. I can do what they’re doing. It’s mostly just lip syncing and a little acting to explain what the song means to them. The show was pride month themed so it was heavy on the angst.

I don’t know how well I would fit in the group. Most of the kings look younger than me and have their cute little queer friends cheering them on. And they look very convincing. I’m guessing they look very convincing off stage as well. The MC referred to some of the kings as trans men. And I’m nowhere near trans. I just want to put a little bend in my gender. I know I wil go back and forth and make up a ton of excuses to do it and not do it before the show. Good thing it’s a month away and I have time for all of this.

I saw a friend from high school, too(at a bar, not the show). It’s nice reconnecting with people. I’m always all blah blah stability so maybe having a little of my past around will help and it will remind me that my entire past was not scary. There was a lot of good that unfortunately doesn’t stick like the trauma does.

Saturday I went to a friend’s wedding reception. There were over 500 guests, 3 dress changes, tons of awesome food, singers and MC’s. I didn’t see the bride and groom sit down for more than 5 minutes at a time. But the most impressive thing was the couple. They’ve been together since junior high. Now they’re in grad school, finally getting married. That’s some make you believe in true love stuff right there.

I have an interview this week for a volunteer position at a GLBT health center in Chicago. I would be able to do clinical work and get supervision toward my LCSW. Clinical work! With a population I like!

I saw a posting on MySpace that a local drag king troupe is looking for new members. They’re having auditions next month and I am thinking of trying out. No singing involved, just lip syncing and performing. Maybe my new short haircut which I hated at first but now almost like has a use! My hair is much easier to slick back now. I could totally be Nick Cave. I think Loverman is a long song but it would be awesome to perform. I need a stage name!

My boss was talking about the Sex and the City movie today and she said that she has a group of friends and each one is like a character. The entire time she was talking I thought “Please don’t be the whorey cougar”. But she isn’t! She is Carrie. Aww thats sweet. She said the same thing again in front of a group of people and no one asked which one she is.

I saw the new Indiana Jones movie on Friday. The theater was a zoo since every other woman in Chicago decided it would be soooo fun to dress up and see the Sex and the City movie. Even my mom called me and told me she was dressing up and seeing the movie with friends. I was surrounded by lots of women in heels and a theater manager making rounds of the lobby, telling the girls how to get their tickets and which lines to clack their heels over to. It would have been a great night to go to the bars and steal boyfriends.

Indiana Jones was fun and slightly ridiculous. Not enough was done with Shia LeBeouf’s character. Shouldn’t he be doing something to make the girls swoon? It’s been a while since I’ve seen other Indiana Jones movies but was the Indy music used as much in other movies? It seems like everytime Harrison Ford got up, the Indy music was playing.

Saturday I went to the Do-Division street fest. Mucca Pazza is always amusing but the street fest was pretty lame. It was small and the vendors were county fair quality. Ooh, a candle in the shape of a skull! Wicked!