My first internship in social services was at Howard Brown Health Center on the EXPLORE study.  I talked to participants about personal details of their life. They shared with me because they wanted to help the community. Social work and psychology are not prestigious fields. People go to into the helping fields with a desire to help and find an agency that they feel will allow them to do the most good. The EXPLORE team chose Howard Brown Health Center. They knew who Howard Brown was.

My experience helped me focus my career goals. Now, as a social worker, I refer clients to Howard Brown Health Center for psychiatric or medical services, support and social groups. In discussions with other providers about resources, Howard Brown is often the only name that comes up. Howard Brown understands the need to treat the whole person and offers much needed services for the community.

First stop after rolling out of bed around 11 on a Saturday morning was Angel Food. It’s in Ravenswood so it’s a little past where I usually go in the city but the boy heard about it on Food TV. Angel Food also serves real food so we grabbed some chicken soup and a cupcake each. The chicken soup was also very good. I got a mud pie cupcake which was served with a dollop of what appeared to be homemade whipped cream with little flecks of vanilla bean. The mud pie cupcake was crunchy on top, no frosting needed. The inside was gooey and rich and after finishing it, I knew the other cupcakes would be To Go. I was a little afraid to serve these at my party. I could see everyone eating them and then being unable to get up. The boy got a Boston cream pie cupcake. His had chocolate frosting and creamy filling. He also noticed the weight of his cupcake just by picking it up. These are no light and fluffy treats. These are serious fucking cupcakes. These cupcakes beat up everyone else in the bakery case.
The Angel Food staff was very nice. They told us how awesome the soups were, brought us water when we took on our cupcakes and cleared dishes quickly. The bakery itself was retro and cute like a bakery should be.

Next up was Bittersweet. My friend got her wedding cake from them and said it was so good it made her want to cry. I was sick with a crazy fever the day of her wedding so unfortunately I never got to try the tear inducing cake.
It was busy when we went in Bittersweet. The 2 counter people were talking to other customers so boy and I perused (licked) the bakery cases. They had lots of small, perfect looking cakes and tarts. Were they plastic? Is it really possible to make a cake that perfect looking? I’m not sure. They have lots of iced cookies, a few types of macaroons and other cookie type things. The only cupcakes they had were mini double chocolates so we decided to get cupcakes and macaroons. We were going to get iced party hat cookies but they were $3.50 each and pretty small.
So one counter person was obviously busy with a big order because she was giving box dimensions that sounded like it could have stored a small child or large TV. I got in line behind the 2nd person who was finishing up. The counter girl finishes with customer, looks at me, turns around and calls out a number. I turn and notice the number tags and guy closer to the number tags was nice enough to give us the next number before grabbing one for himself. Counter girl was nice enough with the rest of the order but what’s with not acknowledging my presence? At least tell me to go get a fucking number.
Obviously, bitch rubbed me the wrong way and her desserts didn’t win me over. We ate the Bittersweet treats last that night and they were the least impressive. The icing was really good, I could tell it was made from a nice dark chocolate. The boy pointed out the cupcake itself could have come from Jewel. The chocolate dipped macaroons were good but I need something more impressive than a macaroon for my party dessert.

After leaving Bittersweet, we went to Bleeding Heart Bakery. Bleeding Heart wins me over before we even go in because they do the whole organic and vegan options thing. I’m not vegan and I ingest more poison than most roaches but I still appreciate healthy options for “unhealthy” snack foods.
So we go in and the tattooed, heavily gauged counter guy is helping some other customers. Some punky music is playing. I think presentation matters so I am happy with this place. They have some awesome looking tarts and bars in one case. Another case has a few types of cupcakes. We ask about the types of cupcakes and choose a hazelnut chocolate cupcake and white with sprinkles. I admit I chose the sprinkled cupcake because it was entirely covered in sprinkles.
The white cupcake had a ton of frosting on it. The top of the actual cupcake was crunchy and everything tastes good but it had something odd to it that reminded me of cornbread. Maybe they use corn flour instead of white flour? The hazelnut frosting was really good. I think hazelnut is a hard flavor to work with. A lot of hazelnut desserts just taste like chocolate to me. The boy offered to buy cupcakes from multiple bakeries for the party so I think he liked his cupcake a lot more than I liked mine.

So even though they might put my guests in some kind of sugar coma, I think Angel Food wins this round. Yay science!

All of my clients cancelled for tonight and I’m not calling any of them until tomorrow. I feel like I’ve successfully engaged my clients and I can see progress but I still get lazy when it’s time to actually go to the counseling center. I don’t know if it’s still anxiety or if it’s just that this is adding to my work week and stress.

My recovery since my last post has been pretty good. The big release of all of my anxiety and feeling of Rightness in the World didn’t happen. Kind of disappointed. The swelling in my belly button has gone down enough that real pants don’t bother me.  I returned to work today.  I just happened to miss Xmas paper door decorating at work! Oh well, I guess they will have to skip me.

Shortly after the CNN announcement, McCain made his speech. They had reported earlier that McCain’s people turned off news coverage at his rally earlier in the night. I think McCain gave a good speech. I think it was even better that Palin didn’t speak at all.
When it was close to Obama’s speech time, the TV’s switched from CNN to the stage at the other end of Grant Park. A woman sung the anthem, then some canned music. Signed, Sealed and Delivered, some country song, Sweet Home Chicago, one more song I can’t remember. Too many songs. Too many shots of Oprah. I loved one shot of an older couple. The guy points to the camera to point out to his wife that they were on camera. She pushes his hand down, still smiling and looking toward the stage and not the camera.
Obama comes on with his family. Talks to his girls, kisses his wife, you can see him say I love you to her. He thanks his campaign staff, Biden, his family, promises his girls a puppy. He lists types of people and includes gay and straight. People cheer. He starts with the “yes we can” and I get a little teary again. He ends, music comes on and Biden and families come to the stage. Lots of hugs and smiles.
The walk back is amazing. It’s near midnight and the streets are filled. Lots of cheering, signs, high fives, sleeping children, vendors, police calmly watching the crowd. Further down there are some scary looking Federal police with rifle looking weapons and riot helmets strapped to their side. They were all just watching. The crowd was happy, wasn’t acting up or even pushing toward the CTA. I didn’t leave downtown right away but I heard the CTA did a good job of managing the crowds.

I tried to take pics but it’s hard to take pictures at night with either a big flash or tripod. Here are a few anyway!

I think I am going to see the Muppet History documentary and Labyrinth.

Then I dragged my new (to me) bike out of the basement, decided to take side streets because I’ve never rode on a city street before and zoom! I was off. Slowly. So slowly. Oh god, why does this take so much effort to get not far? Why can’t I coast? I was sweating and half dead by the time I got to the roommate’s boy’s house. Roommate looked at my bike and pointed out that I was in the wrong gear. I thought
1=easy. Guess not. Also the guy that sold me the bike called it a hybrid but roommate thinks it looks more like a mountain bike.
I wanted to flop on the couch and sleep but it was time for My First Critical Mass! So we rode downtown in all of our zombie, bloody, whitefaced awesomeness. I really struggled with the hills. Yes, Chicago has hills. Small ones but my thighs really felt them when I was barely able to keep up on flat surfaces.
We got to Daley Plaza and it was filled with costumed riders of every sort and a few parents and kids trick or treating. I gave candy to kids, took a few pics and drank a lot of water. Then remembered I didn’t have a chance to eat dinner, maybe that was why I was feeling weak? No, I’m just out of shape.

So we rode through downtown very slowly which I didn’t mind at all since I was exhausted. We waved at people and the traffic cops made sure no one tried to run us over. We get out of downtown and it seems like a parade. The entire street is ours and people are coming out of their houses and businesses to wave and cheer at us. Ya, some people came out of their cars to swear at us but being toward the back of the mass, I expected to see a lot more anger. I read today that mass was estimated 2,000 people.
Then things got very slow and weird. We were close to the highway, on some small road near a bunch of warehouses. There was an ambulance that needed to cut through so we got separated from the rest of the mass. It was so slow that I got off my bike and walked it for a bit because it was impossible to ride that slow with so many people around. After all the slow down, we went back on big streets. I’m not sure why that route was chosen but when riding from Milwaukee & Halsted to Milwaukee & Ashland, why not just take…Milwaukee! Instead of whatever fucked up little streets we were going down. By the time we got to Wicker Park, we were separated from the rest of the group by a noticable amount. Streets were no longer being corked, more cops were seen arresting people than riding with us. I was exhausted and my roommate and her boy were disappointed that the mass got split up so we stopped to get food.
I heard from another friend that did the mass. He was near the very front and didn’t have as many problems. So it wasn’t that we were recklessly heading into trouble, trouble just found us somewhere along the way. With a group that large, I can understand it.
I was so sore that I took the bus home. My ass, knee and elbow still hurt. I’m going to try to ride the roommate’s bike to see if hers is better because I’m still not sure if I was so exhausted because I haven’t rode in forever or if it’s my bike’s fault. I would like to blame my bike because it’s easier getting a new bike than getting sexy new legs. I’m hoping the weather stays nice for a little while longer so I can get some riding in before winter. I know it’s crazy to expect the weather to be nice at the end of November but if by some crazy chance it is, maybe I will do the Nov Mass.

I’m looking for Halloweeny things to do. It looks like I won’t be getting a bike in time for the Critical Mass ride. I’m still looking on CraigsList because I do want one but the cheap bikes go really fast.

Oh, and I went to The Whistler, a new bar in Logan Square. It’s small but I like it. They have a stage for live acts and a DJ table. They do the whole ‘craft cocktail’ thing that’s getting so popular in this area. It pretty much means fancy mixed drinks with rare ingredients that take more skill than sloshing bottles to assemble. One of their drinks comes with a candied hibiscus which is delicious. It’s very much the indie cool kid scene but not Wicker Park hipsters. Think cardigans and a slightly older crowd that still drinks PBR. I wore argyle and felt OK there.

I got my hair chopped short yesterday. I gave the stylist this picture and she did an excellent job at copying the haircut. We made some minor changes, a little longer at top of the back of my head so I can make it stick up. It’s a fun cut but probably one I should have had 10 years ago.

I just noticed the candy I’m eating says it has a bat signal in it and I didn’t see a bat signal. I may have ate the bat signal.

I saw Dark Knight on Monday. Wasn’t there a TV show called Dark Knight? I remember it being Canadian and the main character’s last name was Knight and there were vampires. If it wasn’t so late I would call my parents because I know they watched this damn show and IMDB is telling me its some medieval sci-fi show.

So the movie was awesome. But since everyone’s jerking off over this movie, I have to offer a few criticisms.
The movie was PG-13, why couldn’t Maggie Gyllenhaal’s breasts make an appearance?
Was Aaron Eckhart cast because they couldn’t get Denis Leary? Twinsies!
Where was the big flaming Batman logo?
And that’s all I can say without giving away parts of the movie.