The boy and I have been dieting and working out for a few weeks. We’ve both already lost weight and I’m feeling stronger but that isn’t really making the transition much easier. It’s great to step on the scale and see weight loss or to notice new muscle striations in my arms. It sucks to feel hungry or tired or crave candy.

We work out 5-6 times a week, for me a combination of cardio/weights at Bally’s and classes at Flirty Girl Fitness. Flirty Girl classes are surprisingly hard. I haven’t taken any of the pole/stripper-robics type classes. I have taken classes that involve circuit training, lots of sit ups with medicine balls and step ups onto chairs. (That last one practically killed me.)

So some foods that have kept me from going crazy with soo many boring salads and wraps:

Chicken salad with tofu herb dressing
I made the dressing seperately and use it like a salad dressing. I’m new to tofu so I don’t know how to cook with it but this recipe just requires food processing or blending. The dressing is creamy like a ranch dressing.

Banana “ice cream”
Peel and freeze a banana. Blend or food process it. Refreeze if its gooey. Add nuts or berries as toppings if you like.

Egg whites
Egg white scrambles for breakfast! Throw in whatever veggies you like.

Sugar free jello
Makes you feel like you’re eating something

Not that those foods completely keep me from going crazy and wanting to eat Zingers but they help :)

I started basic burlesque class at Studio L’Amour last week. Boxing is out, burlesque is in. Hopefully burlesque is a bit more successful. I have high hopes because unlike park district boxing, burlesque class is structured. It feels weird for me to say I want structure but when I am a newbie to something, yes I need an instructor that says “Step 1,2,3 and BOUNCE!” I don’t know how those Montessori kids do it.

As usual, I was just a little bit off for the first class. The instructor said we could wear gym shoes or heels and workout clothes. I figured out this does not mean wear basketball shorts so I wore kind of tight yoga capris. I didn’t figure out that gym shoes would be really bad for the small foot movements sexy walking. Or that a loose fitting tshirt would cover my hips. Hips are the best part of dancing! I kind of suck at being a girl but I will try better next time!

At the end of the month when class is done, the new park district session will start. The boy and I joined the park district fitness center. It’s a pretty small fitness center which leaves no room for me to hide in a corner and sweat over my 20 pound weights without anyone staring at me. The goal is to drop my desired amount of weight by the time I hit 30!

I realize this blog is kind of turning into a food blog. Eventually it will turn into something like This is why you’re Fat.

This cake actually wasn’t supposed to be very fattening. My friend asked me to make a rainbow cake for a potluck at her house. She sent me this recipe from The Omnomicon (love the name and I’m pretty sure the author is a SA goon.) There is no rainbow cake recipe, just a white cake of your choice recipe plus tips on making it rainbowed. This cake just called for soda and cake mix.

It’s all lumpy but I was afraid to use an electric mixer because of the carbonation. It doesn’t matter in the end because you stir it a lot more when you add food coloring.
So I divided out the batter into 6 bowls and used my pretty gel dye. I thought the dye would be brighter with less. I felt like I was using a ton of dye. I was scared to make the red an actual blood red because of the amount of dye I would have to use. Isn’t red dye poisonous to children? Oh well, no kids died at the potluck. That I saw.

Then I poured the batter in to the pan, one color on top of the next. One of my friends commented that the batter looks like fake food in the movie Hook.

And then I baked it according to the box instructions plus a few more minutes like the rainbow cake directions say. Its a very squishy cake because of the soda. I took the cake out when the yellow started to look dark.
I let the cake cool while I tried my new dino muffin tins with the leftover cake batter. I set up my cooling rack and tried to get the cake out with disastrous results. The entire middle of the cake stuck, one of the sides started to slide off the rack and I started to make howling noises. No way to repair with frosting. Oh the agony of a broken cake.
No pictures of the broken cake, it was too hard to look at. The dino cakes didn’t turn out well either. The cake didn’t want to come out of the tins. It was the first time I used the muffin pan so I may not have properly greased it.
So I didn’t want to make a new cake and I didn’t want to waste the already made cake. So I made some pudding, used the whipped cream my boy made the night before for dessert, some leftover berries and made a rainbow parfait.

And it was good! It was tasty and still rainbow and kind of pretty.

I don’t do New Year’s resolutions but my boxing class at the park district just happened to start the 2nd week of January so that means I will just happen to learn boxing this year.
It only took one class for me to realize that the boxing boot camp class I took at Bally’s was good for making me sweat but not so good for technique. But that’s why it was boxing boot camp, not boxing training.
The park district is boxing training. Some of these guys (it’s mostly guys) will go on to fight in amateur matches. Some already have. As it is with most athletic things, I am the suckiest one in the group. Everyone seems to tolerate this pretty well. People will stop me and correct my stance or press on my fist to remind me to tighten it up. A girl helped me turn in circles and jab today. It’s a lot harder than it sounds. So far I just punch bags and shadow box so I haven’t interacted much with others.
During my first class 2 guys were sparring and there was some blood. It seems like the blood part is optional. The instructor asked a girl if she wanted to spar today and she said no, she doesn’t want to hit people. So I guess I can train and not worry about my pretty lil face.

The bacon chocolate chip cookies were a success!
The texture was kind of off when they were still warm but the next day when the cookie hardened a little it was better. Tiny pieces of bacon work best, bits not pieces. I had to experiment with the thickness of the maple glaze. It looked thick enough until I put it on the cookies and it spilled all over.

I took some cookies to a potluck last night and warned everyone of the cookie contents so I wouldn’t have any angry vegetarians. This led to everyone asking me about the cookies, where I found the recipe (roommate/Internets) and why the hell I would want to make such a cookie (why not?) so much of my evening was dominated by cookie talk. I’m building quite a reputation in this group. I brought Krispy Kreme bread pudding to the last potluck. There is a block party coming up and I think it’s time to make meatloaf cupcakes.

I finally showed my parents my newest tattoo. My mom kept asking why it has to be so big and took a picture of it to send to my grandma. She tried to pull the “but what about work?” question but I pointed out I can’t wear tank tops to work so no one will see it!
My family gobbled up the cookies, too. Later she poked my abdomen and suggested I get a girdle. When I came home, control top panties were in my laundry bag. Thanks mom!

I went to Buddhism class tonight and there was no teacher. Was this a lesson in self sufficiency? My classmate and I snooped through the temple office and found our teacher’s number. We were concerned since he is in his 80′s and drives from the suburbs to teach. His wife answered and cheerily handed the phone off to our teacher. It was his birthday yesterday and he had forgot..or was running late..or was celebrating. My theory is that he was drunk. I like my theory because I like the idea of an 80+ guy rockin out for his birthday and I like the idea that I can drink and still follow Buddha.

So that wasted about an hour but gave me a little more time to make cookies. I keep forgetting to photograph my cookie making but this one would have really done better with scratch n sniff than pictures. I’m making bacon chocolate chip cookies with maple glaze I had to run to the store to get more bacon because I underestimated the amount of bacon this recipe calls for. After I dumped in my mounds of bacon bits, it looked like too much. But who knows, the dough tastes pretty good even though its hard to get the bacon and chocolate flavor with uncooked dough.

The dough is chilling in the fridge right now and then will get cooked tonight and the glaze will have to wait until tomorrow probably. I’m not sure how all of this will work since my kitchen is super hot and the glaze probably won’t harden.
I will let you know how it turns out.

How can I not like boxing? Look how cool I look with my hands wrapped.

I started boxing boot camp today. So I’m not actually boxing, I’m learning techniques necessary to punch people in the face. My class is small and all women and our instructor is very supportive. My drill partner cheered me on as I tried to put my whole body into uppercuts and hooks. I’m sure I looked ridiculous. I don’t care. This is the most fun I’ve ever had in a gym

And I’m exhausted.

I brought my mini cupcakes and cherries in snow to the parents’ for Easter and some of it was actually eaten! The cupcakes were a bit misshaped because I couldn’t find mini cupcake baking cups so the cupcakes stuck to the bottom of the pan and I had to pry them out with a knife. Everyone made fun of their appearance and likeness to poop but everyone ate them.

Cherries in snow was a bit harder sell. A few of my family members ate it. I thought it had a good contrast between the sweet cherries and milk gelatin. I took the leftovers to the boy’s place and since he doesn’t actually have food in his fridge, he is probably reading this, thinking about how he forgot about the dessert in his fridge. Yes, it’s probably still good.

I’ve been trying to eat healthy so I’ve been making more food rather than buying prepackaged. I like to take recipes down to a basic level, something I can make anytime. Tonight I made guacamole and chips. Guacamole consisted of some leftover avocado, tomato and onion powder. Chips were flour tortillas baked in the oven. Tadas! Chips and guac.

I have been making an effort to lose weight for a month now and I recently weighed in on a good scale and found out I have only lost a couple pounds. I’m eating better and more active so there is obviously a need to rework the plan. I’m also tired a lot. I started using FitDay again to keep track of my foods and activity. I talked to a few people that have lost weight in the past, consulted the internets and to my surprise I need to be eating more. My calorie intake was too low (which is why I feel OK about just eating a snack).
The elliptical was betraying me, too. So I started doing a short, hard workout on the elliptical then moving to weights. I’ve just started doing these things this week. I’m sore already. I need to weigh in more and it’s a pain to hunt down my coworker that owns the “official” scale so I’m going to buy a scale. I should have been weighing myself weekly all month but my previous superstitions about motivation and weight loss kept me away. This time I am giving myself a week and if there is no change, reworking the plan again.

This weekend was my first meditation class. We(boy, coworker and I) ended up going to a different temple than originally planned. The first temple we looked into increased the price for the meditation class the day of the first class. Spending an extra $30 to meditate does not help my zen. So we went to the temple/dojo that my roommate practices aikido at. Their classes are free! They accept donations, of course.

There was a lot of talking and not a lot of meditating which was actually good for a first class. Meditation hurts. My knees and back were not happy. It reminded me how poor my posture is. The leader recommended concentrating on only one thing at a time when you start, either posture or breathing. When you concentrate on breathing, you try to breathe from your stomach and have each breath fill your body. You count your breaths and try to focus on only your breathing, without letting any distractions in. The leader has been practicing for 18 years and cannot always do this. I couldn’t get to 2. I think that says a lot about Western society. We are so rushed and overstimulated, we cannot concentrate for 10 seconds but this is probably something a Buddhist 12 year old in Asia can do.

After meditation we went to Southport Grocer for brunch. That place is soo good. I tried to be a little good and got granola pancakes instead of the incredibly delicious cupcake pancakes (my pancakes were still good, too). I’ve been having a really hard time finding healthy things at restaurants. Some restaurants even fuck up salads and turn them into dressing and cheese covered fat bowls with some lettuce in them. I hate ordering things at restaurants that I could have easily made at home so I’m not down with ordering a wilting fruit plate or a bowl of plain oatmeal. I should just cook more and go out to eat less. But the whole idea that restaurants cannot make at least a few items that are yummy and not dripping with grease pisses me off!

It takes a strong ego to clothes shop with a big ass.

I tried to find a New Years Eve dress tonight. Something a little dressy but not sparkly like I did last year.

Why dress shopping sucks this year:

Trapeze dresses
The model doesn’t even look good in this dress. I tried on one, thought I looked like I belong in a 70′s sci-fi movie, made some raygun noises in the mirror and changed.

Jewel dresses
I’m excited about wearing real jewelry with my dress, I don’t need you to bedazzle it for me. A lot of the extra large “jewels” are placed around necklines which are not good for making the dress cover boobies. Unlike girl in picture, I like to have some parts clothed.
That covers most of the dresses so now all that’s left is

ugly prints and weird ruffled dresses

I would rather not look like I belong on a shelf in a 7 year old’s room.